Riding the Wild Scutum!
Put it in Second Gear!!
Put it in Second Gear!!
It was the year that we fought for the east. Ronald was king of the East. Osgear was our king.
Well, I had exploded my right knee two weeks before Pennsic that year. So could not walk un-assisted. (Still fought two battles and commanded one.) So there I was sitting in the camp from HELLLLLLL! Unable to move much. And a bunch of Fyrd and Hyrd said 'lets go carousing!" When one noticed my hang dog expression it was decided that they would take me.
They got one of the Scuti and took the cross handle off. Loaded up a cooler with cheap beer. Slapped me on top with two mugs and off we went. We careened all up and down the road. Having a great time! When, In front of the eastern camp, I spotted what I thought was a duke in the road. I started to yell "watch out for the duke! Watch out for the duke!" The 'Duke' pulled up tall and proud and said "Its 'your majesty'" (it was Roland.) Just in time to be hit by the scuti juggernaut. We bowled him over and sped by (the look of dumbfoundness on the faces of the gate guards was great! His crown rolled down the road a little ways even!) I started shouting "guys! You just ran over the king of the East!" From under the shield I heard Rodricks voice say..."RIGHT! Double time! Go!" and off we went.
Valens Squire, James was trailing us with cooler of beer on his back. As he passed the prostrate king he stopped and pulled his forelock.
OK, this mode of transportation went on for many days. I even got a little cocky about it . One night we were drinking heavily in the camp from HELLLLLLLL!. (Imagine that!) and I announced that I had to be carried to the john. I missed the significant looks of my 'coolies' They picked me up, carried me to a porta potty, opened the door, and, from 5 foot in the air, dump me headfirst into it. *Sigh* (the bolts for the handle were murder!)
So, its a great honor to be carried on a Scutum, until the Porta Potty door opens.
('Unless your taking the queen of the Outlands to Run over the King of Meridies But that's another story. :)
