Now here's a story, a little bit gory,
A little bit happy, a little bit sad.
About a drink called Imperium Compound,
And how the SCA's been had! ( pass the bottle ) (1)
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Duke Treegirtsea was known for his courtesy,
And his fighting prowess was well-renowned,
Took a thimble of Imperium Compound,
And the poor Duke nearly drowned. (2)
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Words with Andy, you never should bandy,
He is strong enough to kill a moose,
He drinks copious Imperium Compound,
But he can't take Jungle Juice. ( the sissy ) (2)
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Meriwold, he's the bane of a skald, he
Has no attributes of which to sing,
Polite and formal, incredibly normal,
Are you sure he was the King? ( boing, boing, boing ) (3)
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Bearengaer, he lived solitary,
From his presence folks would hide in fear,
Dipped his blade in Imperium Compound,
And we were stuck with him that year.
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Thaid Mak Tlessown, he taught us a lesson,
And his praises now we sing:
With the aid of Imperium Compound,
Any fool can be a king. ( in Northwoods ) (1)
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Azarael, a melodious fellow,
Sings a song both sweet and terse;
After drinking Imperium Compound,
He gets verse and verse and verse! ( he wrote this )
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Hakan Redbeard, we thought it a bit weird,
We thought that Vikings all were six foot four;
Bathed his beard in Imperium Compound,
And he shrank right to the floor! (still singing!)
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
There was Rolac, some thought him a Polack,
But he was a Scot, you see.
He took treatments of Imperium Compound,
Now he's as wise as you or me. ( not likely ) (1)
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Michael of Boar, he did not know the score, he
Had a lot of problems with his queen,
And the shit that he pulled down in Wurmwald
Turned the Midrealm Dragon green. ( oh Boarsy. )
We think, we think, we think,
He needed a shrink, a shrink, a shrink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Master Moonwulf was a very great fighter,
He led us Pennsic and we did quite well,
But he lost to Imperium Compound,
Now he collects his dues in hell. ( he deserved it )
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Good King Nathan, some thought him a no one,
But his twilsey was the best around,
Then he drank some Imperium Compound,
Now his twilsey can't be found ( he's on it )
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Laurelen Darksbane, as a king he is not vain,
As an elf he plays with squirrels in trees,
Then he drank some Imperium Compound,
Now he only needs the trees. ( he's nuttty )
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
The Board of Directors, styled themselves "The Electors,"
And another con they tried to swing;
Now the BoD drinks Imperium Compound,
So we no longer need a King. (7)
We think, we think, we think,
The King is a fink, a fink, a fink,
A figure of respectability
He rules the kingdom with Imperium Compound
The results are plain to see.
Oh the BoD, the BoD, the BoD,
It thinks it's God, it's God, it's God,
The figure of supreme authority,
And if we'd O.D. on Imperium Compund
There'd be no need for royalty! (7/8)
CREDITS: (gotten from The Black Book of Locksley)
(1): Yang the Nauseating
(2): Azarael the Soul Separator
(3): Hael of the Broken Mask
(7): Siegfried v. Hofflichkeit
(8): Karina of the Far West
Where no credit is given: Author/source unknown.